Worse than worthless!

by Vidya Jonnalagadda

Can any activity be worse than zero? Can something be so inane, silly, absurd, ridiculous, ludicrous, bizarre, childish, immature, meaningless, pointless, and futile that it merits a negative score on a scale for utilitarian value?

Sadly, the answer is yes. And one perfect triple example of worthless activity is INSEAD winning a top award for launching black toilet paper! The report at  http://mba-periodical.blogspot.in/2012/02/insead-knowledge-news-alert-insead-wins.html notes “The INSEAD case study documented how Renova, a privately-held European paper products company headquartered outside of Lisbon, Portugal, managed to differentiate itself from its international competitors, transform white toilet paper from a commodity into a premium product, and then enter new business sectors through innovative marketing. The result was “Renova Black,” the world’s first black toilet paper, which rapidly shifted from a novelty item to a luxury fashion item. Equally rapidly, the company moved from supermarket aisles into boutique hotels, fashion shows and the headlines.”

Well, toilet paper has value, but to me, its value does not lie in the designer colors and prints; what matters is that it meets certain service requirements. So, to me, creating designer toilet paper is the first waste-of-time activity. Researching and documenting this instead of following other ventures that produce something of real value is the second waste-of-time activity. And finally, recognizing this documentation as the best management study is the third waste-of-time activity.

Having read about this award, do you also, like me, have questions like: Is making profit the only criterion for judging the “value” of a business? Does success in marketing lie in convincing people that they are someone special if they use designer toiletries? In fact there is one company that tells us to use their products because "you are worth it!" Is there no interest in seeking and studying cases where a company introduced improved utilization of resources or addressed a long-standing social problem such as unemployment? Do most or all MBA students have to study such case studies as ‘model’ business practices? And, like in a recent TV advertisement claiming that responsible parents provide a color printer for their children as the sure shot route to academic advancement, is slick presentation all that is required to garner recognition of merit? Does the social relevance or significance of the content of a presentation have no worth?

Hindi serials

by Vidya Jonnalagadda

Every weekend, I want to watch a movie – see some interesting story. You would think that given the multitude of multiplexes and countless cable channels, I would have a hard time deciding what to watch. I do have a hard time indeed, but in finding something decent to watch on TV, and not just because of the ever-intruding advertisements. It appears that I have already watched everything worth watching on cable! Whatever is left is all too violent, too offensively stupid, or mind-numbingly boring. And in the theaters there is nothing each week that is attractive enough to compensate for the hassle of traffic, parking, and overpriced snacks. If we are lucky, we make it to a theater once every couple of months!

On weeknights, I watch some Hindi serial, much to the mirth and annoyance of several of my family members. How, they ask, can an intelligent person watch episodes where the ‘villainous’ bahu gets the ‘model’ bahu in trouble by switching the containers of oil and ghee in the kitchen, and the model bahu gets scolded for making, in her ‘innocence’, the bhog ka halwa in oil instead of ghee? Granted the serials are very silly indeed, but after a day of work at home and outside, it is somewhat comforting in the evening to escape to the world where such simple household intrigues are the height of treachery and corruption. A welcome change from the empty-speak of anchors, “experts”, and politicians on the news channels – all alleging or denying the latest multicrore ghotala, and claiming in their defense that the other political party did worse things during their tenure. At least the serials do not claim to be meaningful! 

Evaluate your life !

By Vidya Jonnalagadda

Well, we are constantly doing that – evaluating our life – in terms of health, wealth, and familial/social relationships. But have you assigned marks to it? Last year, my life scored 72.8/100 but the year before it was 69.3/100.

Does this sound preposterous? But this is where we are headed in terms of assigning numerical values, or marks - to put it simply, to all activities that our children are doing. If a certain news channel and celebrity endorsements that it has garnered become successful in changing the education policy (now why a news channel should seek to shape policy instead of reporting events and analyzing their implications is another matter), soon students will be awarded marks for games and sports.

How will this work? A child running 100 meters under 20 seconds will get 10 points and those running it between 20 and 30 seconds get 8 points? Score 2 goals in an inter-house football match and capture another 10 points? Play in an inter-school tournament and get 20 points? Will playing in a team event fetch more points than participating in an individual event? And what if a child “fails” in sports – will it affect their promotion/admission to the next class? Will we see the emergence of ‘sports tuition centers’ and ‘guess papers’ and ‘study guides’ to ensure success in the sports Units Tests and Final Exams?

I am not just questioning how marks will be awarded in a fair and transparent manner – I am disturbed by the very thought of awarding marks for everything a child does. Most of the teachers I meet are distressed about the marks-centric mindset of students (one of my students asked “What is biodiversity for 8 marks?”), parents (one teacher told me that a parent threatened to move her child to another school - “Arre, I am paying you so much and my child got only 79%? I should move him back to his old school where he used to get 80%!”), and management (one of my friends filling in for a KG teacher was told “Teach only 4 names of colors, then all students will get 100%. Their parents are paying our high fees, so they expect their children to score at least 90% (for a related story, please see previous blog ‘When is a vegetable not a ‘real’ vegetable?”)). The marks-centric approach has converted school textbooks into Units for 2 marks or 5 marks (in some cases, even fractional marks like 0.5 marks). Fortunes have been made by private bodies (I can’t call them ‘educational institutions’ since their only activity is getting students to repeatedly answer ‘model’ questions) catering to the quest for marks. I see in my college that students do not put in any effort to understand important subjects like ‘Science and Civilization’, ‘Indian History and Culture’, and ‘Environmental Studies’ since marks for these subjects are not ‘counted’ in calculating the final grade for their B.Sc. degree.

Have we reached the day where children will refuse to play (or paint or sing or dance) unless they get marks for their efforts? And, as adults, will they evaluate their lives on a numerical scale?

Education for what?

By Vidya Jonnalagadda

What is the purpose of education? Today, most students (and their parents), expect that following the yellow brick road of the ‘3 R’s will lead them to the magical Emerald City of the ‘3E’s. In other words, Reading + Writing + Arithmetic = Excellent Education Ò Easy Employment Ò Enormous (or at least enough) Earnings!

Recently I read in the news that fewer than 20% of our fresh engineering graduates are employable! If a technical course holds such bleak job prospects, what can basic science promise? As a teacher of basic science, my colleagues and I often ponder on how what we teach can be translated into employability for our students, because one main reason cited for the falling enrollment in science courses is the lack of career opportunities. 

A couple of years ago, our college held an annual function for the MBA students. As I could not attend the Inaugural Session, I asked my father’s friend, a distinguished retired officer of the IAF (Indian Air Force) and a guest at that function, about what the speakers said. He told me that he was shell shocked by what he had heard – (paraphrasing here): “When I was a student, I was told that the purpose of education was to lead a refined life – to appreciate good science, powerful literature, and beautiful Fine Arts. Jobs were just for keeping together body and soul. Today, speaker after speaker told the students how education (degree) is a weapon to bludgeon one’s peers (read competition) into oblivion and soar to success (read corporate positions).”

So, what is right? Do we learn to earn (and lead a lavish lifestyle)? Do we read to breed greed? Or do we study to clear from our minds the muddy mess of ignorance, arrogance, and intolerance? Learn to turn into gentle, considerate, and creative beings? 

I like best the 'definition' of education given many years ago by my friend, Dr. Mokshay Madiman (now at Yale) – “Education should make us good citizens”. Which means law-abiding, responsible builders of strong communities (good parents and good neighbors), and of course, tax-paying (good employers and employees) people who also know and exercise their civic rights.

So, is it possible to design syllabi for high school and college science courses which not only impart strong subject knowledge, but also inculcate skills to convert this knowledge into employment or entrepreneurship?

Even when no one is watching

by Vidya Jonnalagadda

We bemoan the rising lawlessness on our roads; if a traffic policeman is not in sight, every vehicle from a bicycle to a bus will run the red light. Is it that our society lives more by fear of penalty than by self-discipline and doing the right thing?

The incident I want to relate relates to awareness of ‘jootha’ (in Hindi), or ‘ushTa’ (in Marathi) and ‘engilee’ (in Telugu) – sadly there is no term in English to describe this ‘status’ of food and vessels. The closest term I could think of to explain this to my Jewish American son-in-law is ‘contaminated by spit’! Though in my grandfather’s orthodox household, it was not necessary for your saliva to come in direct contact with an item to make it ushTa; touching a container of rice, say, with your (clean and dry) left hand while eating from a plate with your right hand was enough to render the whole pot of rice ‘contaminated’!

But I am digressing – this post is not about how circuits are created to make objects ushTa. It is about the simple decency of common folk. We often buy provisions from a crowded little store in a very crowded big market (the well-known Monda market of Secunderabad), where one has to weave watchfully through cows and carts, people and parcels, and vendors and vehicles to cross a street. So, outside this modest grocery store is a rickety stool carrying a small water dispenser – a plastic jar with a tap. A small steel glass rests on the jar (not tied to it). As I was waiting in the shop for the girl at the counter to bring me the items on my list, I saw a young mother and child stop at the water dispenser. The child could not have been more than five. The mother carefully rinsed only the inside of the glass with a tablespoon or so of water, and filled it up for her child to drink. She poured small 'gulpfuls' of the water into the mouth of her child, taking care not to let the lips of the child touch the rim of the glass. She then refilled the glass and drank some water herself – pouring it down her throat – and put back the glass to continue along the street. She was unaware that I was watching her from the store.

I was moved by what I had seen. There was neither a person to monitor the ‘proper’ use of the glass, nor were there any written instructions posted nearby urging one to ‘maintain’ hygiene. She could have sipped water directly from the glass, and even walked away with it, or left the tap dripping. Treating the water dispenser with respect came from the strong cultural upbringing of that young mother, which she was imparting to her little child. I kept smiling to myself throughout the day, happy to see that there are still many simple decent honest people around.

Curbing crackers

by Vidya Jonnalagadda

We adults are it again – bulling the children, that is. During my recent visit to Mumbai, my young sisters-in-law, Smita and Gauri, both educationists, told me how effective the noise-pollution-free Diwali campaign was. They happily noted that there were much fewer firework booms and bangs in Mumbai this Diwali. Though, of course, global recession may have helped too.

I feel it is a shame that we bully our children to give up the 5-6 days they spend a year anticipating the dhadaams and wheees of crackers and rockets. I mean, how many Lakshmi bombs and ladees does each of us actually set off during our lifetime anyway? Why take away those few hours of joy from our children and teenagers? And say nothing when tons of fireworks are set off at gala events like T20 matches, Formula One Races, Inauguration Ceremonies for National and International Sporting Competitions, and swanky New Year Eve parties?

We adults are showing our double standards again: “Thou shall not create smoke and noise … unless you are the BCCI or their ilk!” It is fine for wealthy conglomerates to mark their mega events with mega bangs, but our little kids are made to feel the guilt for polluting the atmosphere if they set off a few dozen tiny crackers for a few days each year! So, are you interested to see how many people petition to exclude fireworks from London 2012 Olympics?

When is a vegetable not a “real” vegetable?

By Vidya Jonnalagadda

Fear not, gentle reader, this is not a test of botanical definitions, or even an argument about why plant organs that are actually roots (like carrots) and stems (like potatoes) and fruits (like tomatoes) are all clubbed under the generic term ‘vegetables’. What this blog is about is my friend Neetu’s young daughter, Nishtha’s homework for school.

When Nishtha was in first grade, her Hindi teacher assigned the homework of writing names of five vegetables (sabziyaan). After consulting with her mother, Nishtha wrote simple words like aalu, matar, shalajam, and tamaatar. The next day, however, Nishtha returned from school angry and tearful, “aap ko kuch bhi nahin aataa Mummy, teacher ne teen sabziyon ko wrong diya!” A little investigation by Neetu revealed that three vegetables on Nishtha’s homework had been marked wrong because had not been taught by the teacher in class!

This was a couple of years ago. When I called Neetu today to ask if I could write about this incident on this blog, she had all but forgotten about it. Like her, you too might say that it was a small matter after all, no lasting harm done. But I  have thought often about this incident; perhaps it affected me so much because I am upset to see that we are teaching our children that what they see and eat are not “real” vegetables unless they are on the teacher’s list (or in the textbook)!